I am getting married and me and my partner have already been living together for the past 5 years and have all the usual house stuff! At a weddignexpo we went too we were told about a honeymoon registry - we thought it was a great way of getting a honeymoon but i feel a bit strange about it - i not sure what to think - my partner is okay with spreading the word as to that being what we want but i feel presumptuos!! Any advice? has anyone done it??????
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7 responses so far ↓
1 devilishangel // Sep 30, 2008
Never done it, nor WOULD I do it, but I just read in a magazine that if you DO do a honeymoon registry to do a regular registry somewhere else too. It makes sense… I know my grandma would have a conniption if her only option were to pay for part of my honeymoon, as would alot of our more conservative guests. The only reason I wouldn’t do it is b/c I want to make sure the honeymoon is paid off well before the wedding even happens.
2 basketcase88 // Sep 30, 2008
Handle getting the word out about this like you would any registry, or any gift request. The polite way to do it is to have your family members and bridal party share the info with those who ask. People want to give you what you want, so registering for it is not presumptuous at all.
You need to be aware that there are people who will not, no matter what, give a cash gift for a wedding gift. They feel that they should give a physical, tangible gift rather than simply money. So, you might want to think about registering for some non-traditional wedding gifts from a store. Sure, you have all the towels you need, but what about artwork? What about a cool cappuccino machine? What about those pillow covers for the sofa that you like, but can’t justify spending money on right now? THOSE are the things you can register for, and those who don’t want to do the honeymoon registry, will still get you something you want.
Remember, no matter what you receive, please remember to acknowledge all gifts with a hand written thank you note! Congrats and good luck!
3 NikkiM♥BTB 08/29/09♥ // Sep 30, 2008
I love honeymoon registries. I would contribute to that if that was a choice ANY DAY. Just like any other registry, spread the word by word of mouth. OR if you have a wedding webpage (you can set one up for free at http://www.theknot.com) you can add it on there so everyone can see.
People on here are probably going to tell you it's tacky. IGNORE THEM! it's not different than going to a store and registering for fancy china you'll never use.
Anyways, word of mouth or on your wedding webpage would be the best ways.
Good luck and congrats on the upcoming wedding.
EDIT: whoops thought I added this. lol You should probably go have another reigstry too. Some people won't like the idea of a honeymoon registry. Most people register at 2 places anyways so I'd pick out a few items and stick them on a store registry too.
4 Rachel-waiting for 11/21/09 // Sep 30, 2008
My fiance and I are doing one too. We haven’t registered yet, we’re just looking for a good company now. I think it’s totally appropriate as long as you follow the same rules as other registries. That means spread the word about where you are registered by word-of-mouth only, or maybe linked from your wedding website if you have one.
DO NOT mention anything about where you are registered (be it at a store or for your honeymoon) or anything about any gifts on your wedding invitation. And do not mention it if people people call to RSVP, unless THEY ask you about it.
Those are the traditional rules associated with normal registries, so if you follow those you should be fine for whatever you register for. I think registering for you honeymoon is a nice way to get what you want, but not just ask for cash.
You may want to consider also registering at one store that is more traditional (just for some nice housewares, crystal or something kind of fancy) for those guests that are more traditional and will want to get you a more typical wedding present.
Good Luck!
5 Gettin murried 12/31/08 :) // Sep 30, 2008
We’re in the same situation for gifts: been living together for 2 years, have a tiny apartment, and have a comfortable income (so there’s no big thing we’re looking to buy.)
What we’re doing is having a section of our web site where guests can sign up to help out with particular parts of the wedding. We aren’t registered anywhere at all, but this way if people still want ideas they can volunteer to buy the soft drinks, decorations, help with driving people from their hotels, help with handing out name tags and favors, etc. etc. That’s where we REALLY need assistance, haha.
For the registry, I think it really depends on your attitude. I think it’s very meaningful: put money to a time when you two will have a vacation on your own to reflect on the enormity of marriage and just enjoy this change in your lives. I find it much better than just spending $80 on a silver dish.
If you’re worried about etiquette, just make sure you’re not passing along the word yourselves. Or you can maybe ask for specific things AT the honeymoon, like a day tour, some new luggage, tickets to a show in whichever city you’ll be in, etc.
6 Liz // Sep 30, 2008
My opinion - It is presumptuous, and rude and no different than flat out asking for cash. If you have everything you need, then you don’t need anything. If someone chooses to give you cash, that is fine, but to ask for it is just flat out wrong. Honestly, I feel so strongly about it, that I wouldn’t give you anything! Just my opinion, but since someone close to me was having the same thoughts as you, I have talked about it with a lot of people, and we all feel the same. It’s rude.
7 nova_queen_28 // Sep 30, 2008
You would spread the word as you would any registry - - by word of mouth.
Personally, I wouldn’t do it and if I were a guest of someone’s wedding I wouldn’t participate by buying anything off a honeymoon registry. I usually put cash into the envelope for a wedding anyway so I’m sure the couple could use it on their honeymoon if they want but I think it takes nerve for a couple to register for their honeymoon. I mean if you can’t afford a honeymoon then you shouldn’t be planning one and honeymoons can easily be postponed to a later date/time.
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